When you struck out into the workforce, you had two choices: Work for “The Man,” or to become “The Man.” Making good on your childhood promise to never again let someone, “Be the boss of me,” you achieved boss status by starting your own business.
Savings. Health insurance. Retirement. Financial stability. Most people eagerly take on a steady job just to have these benefits, but you scoff at these “creature comforts” and gamble your future on a startup company.
Putting in 70 hours of work per week, you think a 40 hour work week is a vacation. In fact, it’s been so long since you took time off, that the photos from your last vacation were taken with a Polaroid.
Because of you, men and women have jobs and can support their families. That’s something to be proud of. Just don’t analyze your own salary by how many hours you work or you will become very, very depressed.
Technology; you know that your company needs it, but you’ve got so many irons in the fire that you’ve lost track of what’s new, like, four iPhones ago.
So give COMPANYNAME a call at PHONENUMBER oh “Keeper of the Company Vision,” because you deserve a technology company that works just as hard as you do.
This is designed as a parody of Bud Light’s “Real Men of Genius” commercials.